Rainy Sunday Blues

Sometimes my life seems so small, so routine, so unimportant. I have dogs and cats for company. How does that add to the economy of the universe? I flit from one thing to another with barely a breath in between. I don’t stop to get good at anything—really good and accomplished. Just passable, or not. I want to do this, and that, to learn this, and that, to understand, to share, but the sum total is minimal. Okay, it’s a rainy Sunday and I’m reflecting the weather in my mood. Here’s a list of ten things I like just for contrast.

Things I like:

1. Children. My arms are often hungry for the little shapes, the little hands, the little breath.

2. Books. I have an insatiable hunger for books, requiring not only reading, but maintaining the potential to read—piles of books ready and waiting at any time. I read constantly, it appears.

3. Music. I love classical music. I don’t know it, don’t understand it, don’t discuss or interpret it. I just listen to it and it soothes me. It provides a background of beautiful sound in my world.

4. Biking. I love getting out in the world, traveling quietly through it open to the sounds, the smells, the joy of the downhill coast, the effort of the uphill struggle. I love the thermal layers of air in the evening, the blackbirds and frogs, the smell of pigs and horses.

5. Dogs. I find freedom, comfort and companionship in the dogs that surround me. Also hair, messes, and overwhelming ebullience sometimes. I like their willingness to please, their faithful forgiveness, their ready joy for work, and their acceptance of their dogs’ lives.

6. Cats. I like my cat when she likes me, and even when she doesn’t. She is the first cat I have known who considered me her own, and I like that. I like her soft thick long fur although it flies everywhere and people are allergic to her. I like her company at my desk when I’m writing.

7. Trees. I like the trees that surround my house, the walnuts, the maples, even the elms. I admire their strength, their steadfast shelter, and their willingness to harbor the wildlife I enjoy. I welcome their summer shade and the coolness it gives my house and my eyes. The windbreak that keeps the northwest wind at bay all winter long.

8. My house. I like my house—the fun and excitement of building it, and the daily pleasure of living in a space designed to meet my own particular preferences.

9. Ideas. I like the challenge of new projects, new ideas, new ways of looking at things. I like to start projects at home and at work, and I like to hand them off to someone more detail-oriented than I to finish them.

10. Travel. I like to see new places, learn about them, visit them, smell, taste, touch and hear them. And I like to come home again.